ageing

"It's inevitable.

It's undeniable.

I'm ageing."

Hullo, my dearest readers! :]

It is now 5.24pm, Wednesday, 28th November 2007.
With the impending big one-nine in less than 48 hours, this blogger has 3 quotes to share, as a depiction of this past year, fact-specific to my 18th year in this world:

FIRSTLY

Prince Otto von Bismarck once said, "To youth I have but three words of counsel - work, work, work."

After being 18 for a month, I started law school - and oh, boy, wasn't Bismarck right on! Not having realised that university was absolutely NOT supposed to be a time for R&R, I screwdrived first year, only scraping through the final exams. Lesson learnt!

SECONDLY

Thomas Woodrow Wilson, 28th president of the United States, said, "Generally young men are regarded as radicals. This is a popular misconception. The most conservative persons I ever met are college undergraduates."

Truthfully, before now, I've never known anything about the rest of the country, let alone the rest of the world. I won't say I know much now, but I definitely know more now than I did, say, a year ago -- my classmates and lecturers are always discussing the morning news, political movements, and current affairs stretching from PJ to Pakistan.

THIRDLY

Seneca, a Roman philosopher, once said, "Old age is an incurable disease".

Who am I kidding? I have to face it -- I'm getting older, I really am. On Friday, I turn 19 ... and in November 2008, I turn 20. Turning 20 is a bigger deal, I guess, because it really means I wouldn't even technically be a teenager any more! Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh ... There's no stopping time! It feels like yesterday when I was six years old on the first day of primary school, holding hands with Jon and Bryan, both of them promising they'd look after me.

How time has passed!

My best friends when I was a small kid was my neighbour (Bryan) and my kindy bestie (Jonathan), then we grew older and grew up and now we're lucky if we speak to/see each other once a year. My circle of friends changed and changed and changed every year - by the middle of my primary education, I was almost never seen without Tse Mun and Xuyen, then by the time primary school came to an end, my best friends were Tse Mun and Pei Lee.

Then we arrived at secondary school, and there's no doubt my besties in Form 1 were Tse Mun, Vanessa, Pei Lee, Lee Ting, and Su Lynn. Then Form 2, the inner circle adjusted itself - my relationship with Pei Lee was inevitably drifting apart by now - and May Ling, Lee Ting and Lynn Yee were my closest friends in class; Tse Mun steadily my BFF outside class. Next came Form 3, and to be totally honest, Form 3 was the shittiest year of my entire life - I collided headfirst with the biggest bunch of backstabbers I'd ever met and that was the very year that made me grow up by leaps and bounds. My guess is that everybody has to go through that "Form 3" of their lives, only maybe you had that "Form 3" experience when you were six, or eighteen, or thirty-four. Life's porcupinal tendencies vary.

In Form 3, I lost and gained more friends than I could keep track of. It was a tough year. At that time, it seemed like the year would never end, but now that I'm well older and I can look back on the whole shindig with a smile, I'm very thankful I had to go through it. It taught me more than nine years of syllabus-based education ever did. :]

In Form 4, I managed to surround myself with friends I chose for myself, instead of friends I hung out with because we just hung out together. It was a welcome change. My best friends in class were definitely Denise, Wei June, Lydia, Laura, Daphne and Shahira. I also had lots of wonderful mates outside class (from tuitions etc) -- and it helped me become a more positive person than I ever was before, giving me that much-needed boost of self-esteem from the havoc of Form 3. :]

Photos of Denise & me in 2006

In Form 5, no difference 'cause I was in the same class and had the same friends. :] However, through Denise, I made a wonderful new friend in the form of Carmen (Denise's best friend), who grew to become one of my best friends as well! :]

Photos of Carmen & I in 2006 (below) and 2005 (further below)

And throughout it all, the one absolute friend who saw life with me through thick and thin was Tse Mun. Still is, Tse Mun. I love you, girl! :] So when people ask me why Tse Mun is my best friend even though we haven't been in the same class since we were nine years old, and why I say she's my BFF even though we only get to speak to each other a few times a month ... the answer simply cannot be put into words. :]

Another special friend of mine is Vanessa, whose role in my life is unprecedented - she's certainly one of my best friends now! We've actually known each other since we were seven, but we weren't friends then. It was only in Form 1 that we actually got to know (and like!) each other. But then she left to study in London. It might've been the end of that if we hadn't bothered to keep in touch, or if we didn't have the annual sleepovers everytime she returned to M'sia, or if I didn't visit her in London in December 2005. She was the reason my holiday in England was the best holiday I have ever had in my entire life, and she is an important part of my life now. I adore her, and sometimes she knows me better than I know myself. Oh, by the way, and she's back! She's studying in IMU. :]

Photos of Vanessa & I in 2006 (below) and 2007 (the 2 pics below)

I've covered ground until 2005 so far. 2006 was devoted wholly to South Australian Matriculation (SAM), where I made friends, lost friends, made more friends, found friends in total strangers, made enemies in total strangers, and ultimately, found another best friend in An Nie. :] It can be accurately said that among my circle of best friends outside law school, she's the one who is closest to me now. :] An's indescribable - she's wonderful in every way, so different from anyone else I've ever met before. She was so quiet at first, really, but when the ice melted away, she's the warmest soul ever. I also found good friends in Sara Ong and Ee Leing, other classmates of mine in SAM. Today, Sara is An's other best friend. :]

Photos of An (2006) and An & I (2007)

And then 2007 came! :D Law school was new, exciting -- and I met a wonderful, lovely bunch of new friends and we form a strong and steady support system for each other. Truth be told, it's the friendships that inject the colour into the blacks and whites of the study of law! I'm very lucky to be lucky enough to be friends with Cheryl, Faan Jin, Rachel, Leila, etc.. :] Uni wouldn't be the same without them.

First Year, 2007

So ... see how different life is now, compared to when I was six years old, holding hands with my two best friends on the first day of school, all three of us promising each other we'd look after one another?

It can only be a hint of how different life will be in another decade or so!

Ah, but we must not fear change, for with a positive mind and a bright smile, it can only get better. :]

as an 18-year-old for the last time,

xoxo, sha-lene.