It's official.

Josh Groban asked me to marry him.

No, I'm only joking. Sadly. :(

Anyway, what's really official is that this is Day Three on my New Lifestyle Program. I'm calling it the "NLP" because the word "diet" is jinxed and just doesn't work. Technically, everything you eat is a diet. It's just a matter of healthy diet vs. unhealthy diet.

Also, WHEN I lose the targeted 20 to 30 kgs, I will soooo totally write a story on this! I know it's been written a million and one times, but how can I not do it just because other people have already done it? I was gonna say "I will soooo totally write a book on this", but that's been done a million and one times - I know, because I've bought and read a million and one of those books - and I don't have the discipline to write an entire book from cover to cover. :P

Anyway, this is why I love having this narcissistic little blog. :D My first-year journalism lecturer used to say, "The only thing you can write without thinking about your audience is your personal diary" - but personal diaries are now defunct and archaic, and The Personal Blog has taken the world by storm. :)

So today is Day 3. What have I been doing? I've been eating as usual, actually, but minus the 100-times-a-day snacks. My type of food hasn't changed, I haven't ditched my beloved carbs for broiled veggies or anything like that (like that will ever happen! Haha!) - but I've been working out on The Treadmill (which has been collecting dust for the past 6 months in terms of me using it, ever) everyday. :D For that, I deserve a cookie I deserve to blog about this means-the-world-to-me-but-the-world-doesn't-give-two-poopers-about achievement of mine.

Look at those muscles! I will never look like this.

I think I should give The Treadmill a name. So I don't sound like I'm conforming to gym-junkiehood. I think I'll call it The Hamster Ball.

What's my driving motivation? I guess the whole "doing this for Mr Right" thing isn't working out, because I haven't found Mr Right and I don't want this fictional character to think he's such a big shot that I'd lose 30kgs for him - so I'm pegging it down to a battle between two things:

Big, delicious greasy American cheeseburgers and "freedom" fries ... versus ...

GETTING MARRIED.

Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Conclusion thus far: I think I've lost 2 pounds... which is like 0.9 kgs. But it's a START yeah! :D

I've never documented actual NLPs on this blog before, always been too embarassed, but now that I've somehow grown really thick skin over the past few months/year, I think it's okay to blog about losing weight + get braces. Oh yes, I forgot to mention, I think I'm getting braces! :D Like actual metal stuff in my mouth. Well actually I don't know what it looks like, I haven't went to consult the dentist yet.

But my grandparents came over yesterday and they Not Only Wanted Me To Lose Weight (as usual, haven't I mentioned this a billion times on this blog already?), they also wanted me to fix my teeth. Not like they're going to pay for my dental work, ARE THEY?

I'm just curious to see what my extended family will find fault with after I lose 4 stone (oh I just found a nicer way to say "25kgs" :D) and fix my teeth. You can BET that I'll blog about it then too. What's life without critical family members anyway.

Argh. I'd better hurry up along and lose the 4 stone (haha I just love saying that coz it sounds like so little: 1, 2, 3, 4!) before Chinese New Year. Because that's when family members come in herds (like hyenas) or colonies (like vultures). That's why I don't celebrate my birthdays anymore - to avoid actually inviting them into my home to criticise me. I wonder if everyone's families are like this.

Oh, and this is how I'm actually rewarding my newfound willpower. :D It's not a belt - it's a bracelet. It's one of those belt-like bracelets. Haha. I think it has the potential to look awesome.

Courtesy of Lovely Closet :)